Wednesday, September 12, 2007

September 12, 2007 - Helpless

It's hard to sit here, helpless, and look at someone you love who is so miserable. I wish I could fix it. Make the pain go away. Something. All I am is in the way. Nurses coming in and out, tripping over my feet. It feels like one of those little plastic puzzles. You know the ones with the sliding numbers from 1 to 15? You scramble the numbers and then try to put them back in order. That's what we're doing. We shuffle about the cramped room, trading places, trying not to trip over the myriad tubes and cables.

Last night, I finally got to see Melisa around 8:45. She had been in recovery for more than two hours. When I got to her room, she was in a lot of pain and pretty groggy. I spent about 45 minutes with her, made sure they gave her some more pain meds, and went home. Everyone was sound asleep, so I joined them.

Not to be a wimp, but 7:30 came early! Breakfast for kids, clothes on, hair brushed and we're out the door. Three kids, three different schools, but it's nice to be able to spend a little car time with them. I missed them last night. They all seem to be doing great. I think it will sink in more when mommy comes home. It's been such a relief for me having Elizabeth (Mel's mom) and Charlie staying with us for a week. Gives me the chance to be with Mel and not have to stress.

I got to the hospital around 9:30am. Melisa looks much better this morning, although she's still in a lot of pain. Her throat is very dry, so it's difficult for her to talk, but we've been able to chat a bit. Right now she's resting peacefully. Shelly just dropped by with a bushel of love and a bag full of magazines. You should have seen Mel's eyes light up! Thank you for coming, Shelly. She's received so many emails, blog notes, cards, prayers and phone calls in the last 24 hours. Thank you so much for caring about her and helping me take care of her.

I'm not sure yet if they'll keep her another night. I'll write more later on as soon as I know what's up.

1 comment:

Arin said...

Hey Scott,

I totally understand your feelings of "Helpless", but I want you to know, I think the very opposite. What more could a woman ask for than to wake up and have the love of her life sitting by her side? Trust me, I'm a woman and a woman in love with her husband, just like Mel, and what you're doing is help-FULL, full of help-that's you! She knows her children are being cuddled and loved on in her absence and that she has a warm home to go home to. Scott, the way you love Mel is all she could ask for! Just because you're not an Oncologist, or a surgeon, or some bad-ass narcotic doesn't mean you are helpless. Quite the opposite in my eyes!